5 Deep Reflection Questions I ask Myself Often 🤔

With so many different changes happening in my personal life at this time, I realized that I needed to take a step back and really reflect on how I’m doing: not just mentally or physically…but in EVERY. SINGLE. ASPECT. of my life! All too often, we get caught up trying to make it through our day to day that we forget to pause and think about where we once were and how far we’ve come!

I’ve been trying to incorporate these (or a different variation of these) reflections at least once a month. So while we are still in the middle of August, these can still be an invaluable resource! 💖

1. Are you truly living or just existing?

Now, I’m not going to sugarcoat anything: I have lived for what feels like the vast majority of my life simply existing. I have dealt with mental health struggles since a young age which definitely took a toll on me! I didn’t feel like I could truly live when it felt like I was constantly at war with my own mind.

But a valuable lesson that I’ve only recently learned is that I don’t have to remain stuck in what felt like an endless loop of mental health crises. With the help of my mental healthcare team and my support team (and a lot of hard work & dedication), I am slowly but surely gaining my smile back. 💜

2. What is holding me back from accomplishing my goals?

I could write an entire NOVEL about different things that I allow to hold me back from accomplishing my goals, but it would be more fitting to sum it up in one word:

FEAR.

That’s right…fear. And at the end of the day, that’s what is holding many of us back. The fear of failure, the fear of change, the fear of the unknown is often enough to paralyze us and keep us from moving forward with our dreams and aspirations.

It has always been my dream to become a doctor…specifically, a psychiatrist. I have always been passionate about this particular career path but I would be lying if I said that fear hasn’t stopped me from pursuing that dream 110%!

I actually had a conversation with my mental healthcare team not too long ago about this very issue, as they asked what my next steps were in regards to getting accepted to medical school: and honestly, I told them that I didn’t know if it was realistic. There’s too many odds against me. What if my grades don’t meet their expections? What if I score poorly on the MCAT (the entrance exam)? What would I do then?

And I will NEVER forget what they said next:

“Brittany, do you plan on living the rest of your life as a big ‘what if’ scenario? The only one stopping you is yourself.”

I had to think hard on what they said…but they are absolutely right. I can’t live my life in fear of the unknowns. If I never even try, how will I succeed?

3. What am I holding on to that I need to let go of?

To be honest with you all, I almost didn’t include this question in this blog. This question stirred up some very uncomfortable and painful memories for me. But, in the spirit of transparency, I knew that I needed to include this to be my most honest, vulnerable self.

For several years, I have held onto guilt and shame over specific situations that I’ve found myself in: whether I got myself into it, or it was not by my own personal choice.

During the past several months, I have slowly started opening up about certain traumatic events with my therapist because I know that if I keep it buried inside, it will continue to eat at me. But one lesson that I’ve gathered from discussing these situations is that I do NOT need to cling onto the shame and other emotional baggage. It is an unwelcome guest and I do not need to carry it any more. I can take back my life and I do not, and will not, allow past events to continue to rob me of my joy.

4. When do I feel happiest and most like my authentic self?

Hands down: when I am reading a book or writing (whether that be poetry, short stories, etc). I have always loved expressing myself through words on a page. I believe that my writing will always convey more than any words I may speak. 💜

5. What has been my biggest accomplishment this past year?

2022, while we’re only eight months in, has definitely been one for the books! I have met so many goals (more details coming soon 😉) but I would definitely have to say that my BIGGEST accomplishment this year has been falling back in love with myself. And no: that’s not in a conceited way. I mean, genuinely loving the person I am, flaws and all. I have really been focusing on improving myself in all aspects of life and I’m finally starting to see results!

If you haven’t already, I would highly encourage you to carve some time out of your day to reflect on where you are in life: BUT with no judgment. Like my parents always told me, Rome wasn’t built in a day, so don’t expect results over night. Take it day by day. You’ll be glad that you did. 🫶🏾

Yours Truly,

Brittany L. Malone

Founder of Speak Your Truth 💖